While sitting at the Pier Restaurant at Flagler Beach this morning, I watched a group of a dozen birds doing what birds do.  One of the birds found a juicy morsel, and anxiously anticipated eating it for personal nutrition, or for offspring.  As birds often create a commotion chopping large morsels and eating them quickly, the other birds usually notice the commotion and any hanging morsel, - in another bird’s beak.  A chase ensues and the bird with the morsel runs for his life.   

          Birds appear to be totally lacking in a sense of ownership, as any morsel anywhere in the world, whether in another bird’s mouth or not, is fair game.  If the bird drops all or any portion while eating away, the flock members quickly pick it up and devour it themselves.  If the lucky bird stands still for a moment, whatever morsel hangs outside the beak may be snatched away for good.  In such a feeding frenzy the apparent rule of the day is easy come, easy go, or whatever you can grab is yours.   

          Then it struck me that there is an incredible behavioral parallel between the feeding frenzy of birds on the beach and humans in organizations.  When it’s feeding time, is there any difference at all between birds and humans?  I have always surmised fairly close corollaries between animal and human behavior, but drawing a behavior parallel with that of lowly birds seems like stooping too low.  Feeding time bridged the gap easily.

          Given the financial crisis of the nation’s economy, it is clear that humans and birds share the same DNA at feeding time.  Beginning with the TARP money targeted for financial institutions ($700 billion), and currently with Obama’s recovery money ($750 billion) targeted for Pandora’s Box, it appears that a feeding frenzy has stimulated every conceivable form of transmutation to gain entitlement to receive a portion of these loose morsels.  The morsels in this case are loose money, free money, money for the taking.  It is a government grab-bag, a paper piñata. When it breaks, grab the loot and run.

          Fannie and Freddie took a huge portion, followed by Citibank and AIG.  After this early frenzy, American Express changes it’s organizational purpose, and chooses (applies) to become a bank, thereby creating entitlement to apply for TARP money as a bank.  E*Trade, which was formerly an account number with a private bank, applies to become a bank themselves for the same reason.  Exactly how many other non-banks applied to become banks during this recent two-month period is not known, but the frenzy was clearly started.  There is now free money available for the taking for financial institutions, like banks, while the reporting and fiduciary responsibilities attached to taking the money are minimal or nonexistent.  Grab a morsel while you can!

          With Obama’s recovery money, it appears that there may be no limitations on who may be entitled to apply.  If jobs are involved, or the poor continue to suffer, the flood gates are wide open, and all are free to apply, no holds barred.  One of those in line includes Larry Flint, publisher of Hustler Magazine, who is struggling to prop up his lagging circulation and sagging images.  Cities, counties, for-profit and not-for profit organizations, unions, professional organizations, off-shore and illegal operations within the country are free to apply.  The feeding frenzy has been expanded to include everybody with a purpose. 

          Just like the birds, even Obama with his high sounding principles, is going after Bush’s unspent TARP money, a $350 billion dollar morsel hanging out of Bush’s mouth, so this will be available to him after he takes office.  Consistent with Bush’s compassionate conservative orientation, he agrees to release the unspent money so the initial assistance for financial institutions may be sequestered, leaving more of Obama’s money to stuff into and remove from Pandora's Box.      

          Whenever a frenzy is in progress, there are no rules of engagement, there are no ethics, and for the people, there is no accountability and no government responsibility. It is a free-for-all, a barroom brawl. 
          While it is a flimsy analogy, it is reminiscent of the definition of boats often seen around marinas, together with the democratic corollary in a crisis:

          Unlike the birds on the beach, when the birds run out of morsels, they set about looking for more morsels on their own, and do not collectively set about sharing vittles with each other out of compassion.  It is every bird for himself.  When a morsel is swallowed, it is gone forever.

          In Washington, the morsels are paper IOUs that circulate like real money, and there is no limit to the number of IOUs our government will print.  If you run out of IOUs, simply print some more.  In short order, the IOUs and the actual money they represent lose value through inflation.  And the current gang in Washington is only minimally responsible to repay the IOUs.  They will blame the whole deal on Bush, and they accept no personal responsibility for themselves, shades of Barney Frank, Chris Dodd, and yes, the anointed one, Barack Obama.   

          In a feeding frenzy, there are no rules.  Nancy Pelosi and her loyal leftists have swept all restrictions aside for the next administration’s onslaught.  Let the feeding begin. 

          At least the birds offer no pretense of behaving ethically.  Like vultures on a carcass, they eat fast before it all disappears. 

          Is there really any difference between the vultures on a carcass and the political morass of folks who are salivating at the prospect of free vittles?  Whoever said there is no free lunch may even be standing in line with Larry Flint.